Sunday, June 7, 2009
On a more practical note...
...it's been nearly a month and a half since I last ran. Lamezor. I need to get on that again. It's so dang hooooooooot in Texas, though.
I am back...
...in Lake Jackson.
It was hard to leave Galveston this morning. After nine days, it became home, and that's difficult to walk away from.
I have a great place to live in Lake Jackson -- don't get me wrong. But in Galveston, I have people who care, and who I care about. Who will make fun of me when I'm spaced out on prescription drugs, and who will talk about their lives and their hurts and their joys and let me share mine, and who will talk me into large ridiculous hats that make me laugh.
I'm sappy, I know. But I like that about myself.
It was hard to leave Galveston this morning. After nine days, it became home, and that's difficult to walk away from.
I have a great place to live in Lake Jackson -- don't get me wrong. But in Galveston, I have people who care, and who I care about. Who will make fun of me when I'm spaced out on prescription drugs, and who will talk about their lives and their hurts and their joys and let me share mine, and who will talk me into large ridiculous hats that make me laugh.
I'm sappy, I know. But I like that about myself.
Saturday, June 6, 2009
My grams...
...would have been 75 today. It's been nearly two years since she left us, and I still miss her every day.
Friday, June 5, 2009
The plan to go...
...home yesterday fell apart, as I decided to take today off of work as well. I don't typically accomplish much on Fridays anyway.
And staying meant yummy food and ice cream afterwards.
Today, while incapable of driving, I was tired of sitting around feeling useless, so the kitchen is clean. A girl's got to do something to keep herself occupied.
And staying meant yummy food and ice cream afterwards.
Today, while incapable of driving, I was tired of sitting around feeling useless, so the kitchen is clean. A girl's got to do something to keep herself occupied.
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Now for a message...
...from our sponsors.
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{I don't actually have any sponsors. It would be rather strange if I did.}
When I came to Galveston last Friday evening, I didn't expect to be spending nearly a week here, with two day jaunt to Austin in the middle. Austin was planned, but what wasn't intentional was the extension of my stay, which could be more characterized as a return.
Yesterday morning I called off of work, having developed an angry red rash that needed medical attention. I was still on the island in the morning, and had a breakfast meeting with someone to discuss fundraising, and then could have gone to Urgent Care here, but my insurance card was in Lake Jackson. I had failed to put it in my wallet when I received it. So I finished my meeting, gathered up my stuff, and went home. I found the card and looked up doctors in the area. There was one -- just one -- in Lake Jackson, who wasn't taking new patients until September. Yes, SEPTEMBER. The closest urgent care facilities were in Pearland and Galveston. Cranky, exhausted, and in pain, I spent just two hours (maybe two and a half) at home, then drove back to Galveston.
The doctor at the Urgent Care here was fantastic. He was chill enough to make showing him the rash (in a place that generally prefers to stay hidden) not awkward at all. And he didn't hand me a bunch of lines when he diagnosed it: I have shingles, and whatever pain I was in yesterday was probably only going to get worse. He gave me some reading material, sent me on my way, and called in a prescription. Or three, to be exact.
Too tired to drive home, I went back to Luke and Maggie's house. They had a meeting, but we decided to do dinner afterwards. While they were gone I got my prescriptions and took the first dose of vicodin. I don't think I knew how much pain I was in until it went away. I knew it hurt, but it wasn't excruciating or even fully debilitating. It was mostly stiff and uncomfortable. The vicodin took that away, and made me pretty loopy. When Maggie called to say they were on the way back, she asked me if I was high. On the way to the Strand I made some goofy comments that were not out-of-character, but definitely encouraged by the drugs.
This morning I got up and took the full round of meds -- all three prescriptions. Luke had to come back and let me into the house, as the key wasn't where I'd left it yesterday, and Maggie just dropped me off after breakfast. I got inside and sat on the couch, totally zoned out. My hands were shaking and I stared at them for a moment going, "Huh." Right before Luke left again he asked me if I was all set. I said, "Yeah. I'm just going to sit here for a while." He laughed at me and went back to work.
I spent the next couple of hours just sprawled on the sofa. My mind isn't focused enough to even read a book or flip on the TV (actually, the TV might be WAY more stimulation than I can possibly handle). I need to go home at some point today, but I haven't decided when. I have just a few small windows of opportunity to make the drive drug-free. One is in less than an hour, and there will be another around 5:00.
I'm shooting for 5:00.
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{I don't actually have any sponsors. It would be rather strange if I did.}
When I came to Galveston last Friday evening, I didn't expect to be spending nearly a week here, with two day jaunt to Austin in the middle. Austin was planned, but what wasn't intentional was the extension of my stay, which could be more characterized as a return.
Yesterday morning I called off of work, having developed an angry red rash that needed medical attention. I was still on the island in the morning, and had a breakfast meeting with someone to discuss fundraising, and then could have gone to Urgent Care here, but my insurance card was in Lake Jackson. I had failed to put it in my wallet when I received it. So I finished my meeting, gathered up my stuff, and went home. I found the card and looked up doctors in the area. There was one -- just one -- in Lake Jackson, who wasn't taking new patients until September. Yes, SEPTEMBER. The closest urgent care facilities were in Pearland and Galveston. Cranky, exhausted, and in pain, I spent just two hours (maybe two and a half) at home, then drove back to Galveston.
The doctor at the Urgent Care here was fantastic. He was chill enough to make showing him the rash (in a place that generally prefers to stay hidden) not awkward at all. And he didn't hand me a bunch of lines when he diagnosed it: I have shingles, and whatever pain I was in yesterday was probably only going to get worse. He gave me some reading material, sent me on my way, and called in a prescription. Or three, to be exact.
Too tired to drive home, I went back to Luke and Maggie's house. They had a meeting, but we decided to do dinner afterwards. While they were gone I got my prescriptions and took the first dose of vicodin. I don't think I knew how much pain I was in until it went away. I knew it hurt, but it wasn't excruciating or even fully debilitating. It was mostly stiff and uncomfortable. The vicodin took that away, and made me pretty loopy. When Maggie called to say they were on the way back, she asked me if I was high. On the way to the Strand I made some goofy comments that were not out-of-character, but definitely encouraged by the drugs.
This morning I got up and took the full round of meds -- all three prescriptions. Luke had to come back and let me into the house, as the key wasn't where I'd left it yesterday, and Maggie just dropped me off after breakfast. I got inside and sat on the couch, totally zoned out. My hands were shaking and I stared at them for a moment going, "Huh." Right before Luke left again he asked me if I was all set. I said, "Yeah. I'm just going to sit here for a while." He laughed at me and went back to work.
I spent the next couple of hours just sprawled on the sofa. My mind isn't focused enough to even read a book or flip on the TV (actually, the TV might be WAY more stimulation than I can possibly handle). I need to go home at some point today, but I haven't decided when. I have just a few small windows of opportunity to make the drive drug-free. One is in less than an hour, and there will be another around 5:00.
I'm shooting for 5:00.
Sunday, May 31, 2009
After my comment earlier...
...about how I'd go back to my college years if I could, to better utilize my education, I got on BellTower (Adrian's student records index) to find my transcripts.
First, I was reminded that the class I thought I had taken as a freshman seminar is the one I wanted -- not the one I was actually in. It's sad, in that I don't remember my own class and that the class had so little effect on me.
Then, I found myself doubly frustrated by the lack of education in my education. I made the Dean's List every semester -- but what does that mean now?
In high school, I wanted to hit fast-forward in order to get to college. In college it was "real life" I was aiming for. When I was working, I was waiting for my big break.
Now, I'm happy where I am for the first time, but I'd like to go back and reclaim the things I missed in my own anticipation of the future.
First, I was reminded that the class I thought I had taken as a freshman seminar is the one I wanted -- not the one I was actually in. It's sad, in that I don't remember my own class and that the class had so little effect on me.
Then, I found myself doubly frustrated by the lack of education in my education. I made the Dean's List every semester -- but what does that mean now?
In high school, I wanted to hit fast-forward in order to get to college. In college it was "real life" I was aiming for. When I was working, I was waiting for my big break.
Now, I'm happy where I am for the first time, but I'd like to go back and reclaim the things I missed in my own anticipation of the future.
It's time for another...
...Q&A with C-Jo.
{Don't ask me why, but I'm really having fun with these right now.}
1. How late did you stay up last night? I'm not really sure. Past midnight, but I just sort of fell into bed and didn't even look at the clock.
2. Do you prefer someone taller or shorter than you? Taller. Thank goodness I'm little.
3. Are you okay with making a total fool of yourself? Yesterday Luke, Maggie, and I went down to the strand for fun/dinner. We found a bunch of balloons (a bunch like grapes...they were attached to each other) on the sidewalk. I proceeded to try to keep them in the air and with us while we walked. There was a slight breeze going in the other direction, and I gave up. Oh, P.S. I was straight sober. (I feel like many of the things I do require that disclaimer, because most people would only do them drunk.)
4. Have you ever been played? Um...maybe? Kind of
5. Do you enjoy being single? I do, most days. I love having the freedom to just be me, without concerning myself heavily about what another person thinks or needs or wants. Perhaps that's selfish, but it's wonderful.
6. Name one thing you did yesterday. I already did, but I'll name another. Maggie and I went to the Coastal Living 2008 Idea House for a self-guided tour. Then sat on the downstairs porch (the only place that didn't have "Please do not sit on the furniture." signs) and had a very long conversation with a woman who told her husband she was "educating" us on matters of politics and the like.
7. Who were you with the last time you went to the movies? Went to the movie theater? Maggie and Luke. Actually saw a movie? Amy, Maddie, and Jeff.
8. Do you ever get “good morning” texts from anyone? Nope.
9. What were you doing Friday night? Attempting to see X-Men Origins: Wolverine. Failing because their credit card machine was down, and getting ice cream at Ben & Jerry's instead.
10. Do you like being home alone or does it freak you out? In the pool house it's fine. In the big house...freaky! Too many corners and dark places.
11. What’s the greatest thing that happened to you today? It's 8:10am. The greatest thing to happen so far is that I woke up. Although I'd much rather have slept longer than 7:15, so I'm not sure how "great" that is.
12. Would you rather smile over a lie or cry over the truth? As much as it would hurt, cry over the truth.
13. If you could move away, no questions asked, where would you move? I thought I just did that? But okay, if not Texas, then maybe Washington State. Four seasons, ocean, and mountains. Or Australia. Or Africa.
14. How much do looks matter to you in a guy? I'm not taking the high road: they matter a lot. However, a man's nature and spirit have the potential to override any minor imperfections or flaws in his appearance.
15. Have you ever told anyone you were okay when you really weren’t? Every day. Little lies protect me, or so I think.
16. Would you go out in public looking like you do right now?cSure. I'd prefer to brush my teeth first, but I don't think I look terrible this morning. Perhaps sleepy and like I just rolled out of bed -- because I did.
17. What’s the first thing you did when you woke up? Curse the sunlight.
18. Have your friends ever randomly stopped by your house? Not that I can particularly recall, though I certainly wouldn't mind them doing so!
19. Who is the last person you had a deep conversation with? Luke and Maggie. See #30 from Wednesday.
20. If you could have something back right now, what would it be? My college years. Though they formed the person I am today, I've lately been mourning the loss of my education. I didn't really apply myself in college -- just like in high school, I did the work to make the grade, not to learn. I wish I had learned the value of education long before I left it.
21. Is this the best year of your life? Six months in, I'd have to say yes. It's the first year that I've stepped up and taken the reins on my own life, and it has been amazing.
22. If your friends warn you about someone, do you listen? I haven't. Not always. But I'd like to start.
23. Are you keeping a big secret right now? If I was, I wouldn't tell you.
24. Has anyone ever sang to you? Not when it wasn't meant as a joke. I might melt into a puddle of Carolyn-ness if it does happen, though.
25. Would you be able to date someone who doesn’t make you laugh?Oh, hell no.
26. Have you ever fallen asleep while texting someone? Not in the middle of writing a text, but probably in the conversation.
27. Do you like the rain? Absolutely.
28. Say your last ex runs up to you and hugs you, what do you do? First, freak out because he's in Texas. Second, probably say something snarky like, "What the heck are you doing here, and why are you hugging me?" Third, leave.
29. Did you ever tell your parents you were going somewhere but went somewhere else instead? Probably, but not intentionally. More like, "Oh, I'm going to the library," but I end up at the grocery store instead.
30. Do people underestimate you? Of course they do. In a strange way, it motivates me more than people thinking highly of me.
{Don't ask me why, but I'm really having fun with these right now.}
1. How late did you stay up last night? I'm not really sure. Past midnight, but I just sort of fell into bed and didn't even look at the clock.
2. Do you prefer someone taller or shorter than you? Taller. Thank goodness I'm little.
3. Are you okay with making a total fool of yourself? Yesterday Luke, Maggie, and I went down to the strand for fun/dinner. We found a bunch of balloons (a bunch like grapes...they were attached to each other) on the sidewalk. I proceeded to try to keep them in the air and with us while we walked. There was a slight breeze going in the other direction, and I gave up. Oh, P.S. I was straight sober. (I feel like many of the things I do require that disclaimer, because most people would only do them drunk.)
4. Have you ever been played? Um...maybe? Kind of
5. Do you enjoy being single? I do, most days. I love having the freedom to just be me, without concerning myself heavily about what another person thinks or needs or wants. Perhaps that's selfish, but it's wonderful.
6. Name one thing you did yesterday. I already did, but I'll name another. Maggie and I went to the Coastal Living 2008 Idea House for a self-guided tour. Then sat on the downstairs porch (the only place that didn't have "Please do not sit on the furniture." signs) and had a very long conversation with a woman who told her husband she was "educating" us on matters of politics and the like.
7. Who were you with the last time you went to the movies? Went to the movie theater? Maggie and Luke. Actually saw a movie? Amy, Maddie, and Jeff.
8. Do you ever get “good morning” texts from anyone? Nope.
9. What were you doing Friday night? Attempting to see X-Men Origins: Wolverine. Failing because their credit card machine was down, and getting ice cream at Ben & Jerry's instead.
10. Do you like being home alone or does it freak you out? In the pool house it's fine. In the big house...freaky! Too many corners and dark places.
11. What’s the greatest thing that happened to you today? It's 8:10am. The greatest thing to happen so far is that I woke up. Although I'd much rather have slept longer than 7:15, so I'm not sure how "great" that is.
12. Would you rather smile over a lie or cry over the truth? As much as it would hurt, cry over the truth.
13. If you could move away, no questions asked, where would you move? I thought I just did that? But okay, if not Texas, then maybe Washington State. Four seasons, ocean, and mountains. Or Australia. Or Africa.
14. How much do looks matter to you in a guy? I'm not taking the high road: they matter a lot. However, a man's nature and spirit have the potential to override any minor imperfections or flaws in his appearance.
15. Have you ever told anyone you were okay when you really weren’t? Every day. Little lies protect me, or so I think.
16. Would you go out in public looking like you do right now?cSure. I'd prefer to brush my teeth first, but I don't think I look terrible this morning. Perhaps sleepy and like I just rolled out of bed -- because I did.
17. What’s the first thing you did when you woke up? Curse the sunlight.
18. Have your friends ever randomly stopped by your house? Not that I can particularly recall, though I certainly wouldn't mind them doing so!
19. Who is the last person you had a deep conversation with? Luke and Maggie. See #30 from Wednesday.
20. If you could have something back right now, what would it be? My college years. Though they formed the person I am today, I've lately been mourning the loss of my education. I didn't really apply myself in college -- just like in high school, I did the work to make the grade, not to learn. I wish I had learned the value of education long before I left it.
21. Is this the best year of your life? Six months in, I'd have to say yes. It's the first year that I've stepped up and taken the reins on my own life, and it has been amazing.
22. If your friends warn you about someone, do you listen? I haven't. Not always. But I'd like to start.
23. Are you keeping a big secret right now? If I was, I wouldn't tell you.
24. Has anyone ever sang to you? Not when it wasn't meant as a joke. I might melt into a puddle of Carolyn-ness if it does happen, though.
25. Would you be able to date someone who doesn’t make you laugh?Oh, hell no.
26. Have you ever fallen asleep while texting someone? Not in the middle of writing a text, but probably in the conversation.
27. Do you like the rain? Absolutely.
28. Say your last ex runs up to you and hugs you, what do you do? First, freak out because he's in Texas. Second, probably say something snarky like, "What the heck are you doing here, and why are you hugging me?" Third, leave.
29. Did you ever tell your parents you were going somewhere but went somewhere else instead? Probably, but not intentionally. More like, "Oh, I'm going to the library," but I end up at the grocery store instead.
30. Do people underestimate you? Of course they do. In a strange way, it motivates me more than people thinking highly of me.
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